Archive for August, 2010

why don’t we use phones for talking??

August 17, 2010 - 10:42 pm 15 Comments

today i was trying to make plans by sending this text to one of my friends, who we can refer to as persontextwassupposedtogo. or PTWSTG. (those people are right, acronyms make life so much easier) the other person involved can be WRONG PERSON. no acronym needed.

how do you feel about beach with WRONG PERSON? ha. remember you can say no!

and i then went about with my business when i got this text back:

ummm… think that was supposed to go to PTWSTG

aw, come on. i seriously sent that text about wrong person to wrong person? in reality, i don’t think what i said was that awful, but it definitely could have been… nicer. wrong person had called me earlier instructing me to see if PTWSTG wanted to hang out with us, so he was game for including her, but any views about having me there have probably shifted since seeing that sketch invitation… ugh. i’m so silly.

be nice… to… children?

August 16, 2010 - 9:27 pm 13 Comments

i went to a park today because i promised my friend that there’s a petting zoo next to said park and that we would pet animals. although there was a farm nearby, a sign next to the entrance warned us not to feed or pet the animals inside. so. um…

maybe in my memory i just remember touching the animals.

as wrong as that may be.

today, we trekked through woods in casual clothes and open-toed shoes, while many a runner and other sporty types did their thing. there was also a man with hiking poles, which was definitely more out of place than i was because he was next to a very large, very paved, main road at the time.

very flat.

nice try, dude (i think he was around sixty years of age and maybe they were walking aids, but i already said they were for hiking, so there).

eventually we stopped at the playground because there was this peculiar swing that was just a large dish, and there were all these kids piled onto it, and what was bound to be somebody’s parent was pushing them, and it just looked so much fun. and after waiting politely after at least fifteen kids went on it (jesus christ, why isn’t there school in the summer??), my friend and i swung for about three minutes until this kid on a nearby bench told us, rather discourteously, “i’m waiting for the swing.” so like the good adults we pretended to be, we stopped the swing, let him climb on, and eyed him menacingly from another bench because what the hell, that was our swing.

he so did not swing as high as we did. silly six year-old boy whose feet could not touch the ground. i laugh at you.

oh, and on a separate note, once i saw this, guess what i did.

damn straight.

i don’t know how we used to play on playgrounds as children because a lot of the things are freaking scary now, including the jungle gym. it’s so highly elevated that the altitude is probably really dangerous for proper breathing… and falling would hurt a lot. what’s more, it’s like you need to know axiomatic geometry to navigate through that big rope ball. i just don’t know how i survived as a kid. oh, right. it’s because i was so. fearsome.

actually, i don’t think that’s the right word.

these pictures are to prove the massive heights i conquered. you can see the truth now.

jungle gym 1jungle gym 2